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January 09, 2008 - 11:03 AM
Daniel Wharton from Michigan

  I was in a relationship with a married woman who was going to leave her husband for me and then backed out. After this point we stayed friends. A month later she contacted me and said she was pregnant. She told me that it was her husband’s child and that she was sorry for all the pain she put me through. I stayed friends with her. We had talked and said that she and her husband would be tested to make sure it was infact their child when he was born. Two days after the birth she contacted me from the hospital saying that all was well. She said He was their child. She had told the nurse that she wanted to be tested because of the situation that she had been in. About four months later she started calling me and saying that the child looked like me. After two months of her calls consisting of conversations about her thinking he was my child, I asked her if it would make her feel at peace if we just went and got a DNA test. So she, the baby and I went and had a DNA test done. She asked me what we would do if he was mine. I told her if she had the testing done like she said, that he was not going to be mine. We discussed that if in some chance that he was, I thought we might try to have a relationship so I could be in my child's life as much as possible. Two weeks later the results come he is in fact my child 99.88% positive. I started seeing him on a regular basis. My whole family meets my son including my (mom, dad, step dad, brother etc) this goes on for about four months without her husband knowing that I'm seeing him. I get the feeling that the mother just wants to be in a relationship with me and she really doesn't care if I'm in my son’s life. I ask her if she wants me in his life no matter our relationship outcome. She tells me yes. The next day i tell that i talked to a lawyer about my rights and i asked if she would sign a new acknowledgment of paternity stating that i was the father. Two days later I try to call her. The phone number has been changed. I contact her at work (I work with her). She tells me not to come see her or try to contact her at all. I hired a lawyer the day that she cut off contact. I got my day in court early 2007. I felt very prepared with my DNA test, many pictures, phone records, and proof of our relationship. I asked to pay child support, visitation every other weekend, one week day a week, Father’s day and three weeks in the summer. This case was held at the Washtenaw County Court in Ann Arbor, Mi. The case took about five minuets. The Judge didn't even ask to see the DNA test, any photos or look at any proof of my relationship. The Judge did not ask me to take the stand or my brother who came with me. Long story short you have no rights in Michigan if you are the biological father and you have had a relationship with your child. WOW what a shock. I just don't feel its right for my own son a product of me to not know his own biological father not only that I can’t even begin to tell you how this has affected me. I thought this might educate people in Michigan by telling all of you that might read this what happend to me. The law in Michigan in my mind is very wrong and I will work to try to educate people and get this law changed. If you would like to help please click on Bill's link to contact Michigan Legislation. Any further questions or comments about this can be directed to my email below. Thanks for reading.

Daniel Wharton
[email protected]


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July 12, 2007 - 04:37 PM
Jill from CT

  I first heard your story several years back on a babycenter posting board. I heard that tonight Paul Zahn is doing a story on CNN regarding the terrible paternity laws in this country and it made me think of your case. Good luck, please do not give up hope that you will be reunited with your little boy.
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July 02, 2007 - 01:59 AM
Philip Brown from CA
Philip Brown's homepage

  Pal, i'm a father of a 4 month old child and i get to see him every day. My heart breaks for you mate. Don't give up, thats what the f******* want. Females have despicable rights in Family Court. Its a disgrace to this nation, politicians must find a balance, men must find the energy to unite and lobby.

God Bless you, i have added your site to my favourites and i will keep checking back. I have a slogan framed above my computer that says "A man is never beaten when he loses a man is only beaten when he gives up" dont you give up mate, for you and every other dad in the country
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April 22, 2007 - 01:41 PM
Pop from New Jersey

  Hey Bill-I came across your web page because my son is all I think about and typed in "i love my son." My sons mother and I have been together for about 9yrs before my world came to a terrifying halt.I am a 26yr old chef here in atlantic city and have been miserable ever since. We had the house, cars,golden retriever and all. She cheated on me for the second time and gave me back the engagement ring. From that point on, I began using any thing to keep my mind off of what ever I was going through. I am still dying inside and from time to time still break down and cry. I loved her with every molocule in my body and knowing I wasnt going to have my little prince everynight snug in my arms drove me a few times to the point I wanted to commit suicide.I knew if by doing so, I would never again smell his shirts, kiss his cheeks, tickle him before he dose off to sleep or tell him how much I loved him. I continued using pain pills and a little coke from time to time and ulimately lost my apartment, my truck and then all rights to my son only because i failed to show up to court for the 18th time in 4 months. She took everything from me and I didnt bother putting up a fight like you are. I just wanted him to have every thing in this world even if it meant her taking the last cookie. What im trying to say Bill is, no matter what situations we go through in life be it mothers or fathers, your children are your children regardless of what the laws say. Stay focused and strong and talk to everyone you see.You'll be amazed how much info you get from a single encounter just by saying "hi".
Give Caleb a hug for us when you see him, sincerly-friends from jersey.
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February 05, 2007 - 09:20 AM
Brent from Michigan

  I have gone through a similar circumstance lately. It is heart breaking to not be able to be a part of your child's life. The pain is unimaginable. I have written this poem to help you and others:

Beautiful baby, child of mine
I've waited so long to see your eyes shine
dreams dreamt of you, holding you close
feelings of joy feeling of hope

my love for you, and that of your mother
will forever exceed that of another
someday you'll feel what I feel inside
someday you'll smile, and break down and cry

alas

I'll never see you, I'll never meet you
but don't ever forget that'll I'll be here for you
I'll love you from here, of that you'll be sure
and dream of the day I hold you near

I'm sorry that I was not there for you
I'm sorry that I let you down too
I never wanted this to occur
More than anything I wanted to be there for her

now

This pain inside, this pain I feel
I do not think ever will heal
My soul is shattered, heart torn in two
All because I will never know you

If ever you need me, good times or bad
I want you to know, you can come to Dad
I'll be here waiting, thinking of you
Ready to start our relationship new
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December 04, 2006 - 11:32 PM
John from New Orleans

  I have a son who is now 1 1/2 year old. I can't imagine life without him and what you must be going through on a daily basis. My thoughts and prayers are with you.
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September 17, 2006 - 10:44 PM
j phillips from georgia

  I READ YOUR STORY AND YOU SEEM TO BE A LOVING AND CARING FATHER BUT FROM WHAT I READ THE LAWS AND THE COURTS WILL NOT LET YOU BE THE FATHER YOU WANT TO BE AND RAISE AND HAVE COMMUNICATION WITH YOUR CHILD .BUT REMEMBER THIS BILL GOD IS IN CONTROL AND THERE IS NOTHING GOD CAN NOT DO . AND YOU WILL ALWAY BE THE CHILDS FATHER AND ONE DAY THAT CHILD WILL WANT TO KNOW WHO HIS REAL FATHER IS . AND AND IT WILL SEEK TO FIND HIM SO TIL THAT DAY COME YOU KEEP A JOURNAL SO THAT THIS CHILD WILL ALWAYS KNOW THAT HIS FATHER WANTED TO BE THE FATHER TO HIS CHILD LIKE GOD PLANNED IT TO BE. MANS LAW WILL FAIL, BUT THE LOVE OR JESUS WILL BE FIRM TIL THE END .MY PRAYERS ARE WITH YOU . J PHILLIPS
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August 20, 2006 - 11:29 PM
teri stoddard from ca
teri stoddard's homepage

  Thinking of you tonight.
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May 26, 2006 - 10:27 PM
Jamee from Hawaii

  Bill, I was astounded and appalled when I read about your situation with your son. I am a strong advocate for dads rights and deplore the stereotypes and attitudes that make dads somehow the "lesser parent." Please let me know if you need any pro bono help with legal research. I have no idea of how you are paying your legal fees but I know that the number of billable hours has to be over the top. I'd be more than happy to help. Feel free to contact me.
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May 26, 2006 - 12:16 PM
Melissa from Pennsylvania

  While doing research for a college paper I came across your information and I wanted to let you know that I was very moved by your story. I was unaware of that much parental injustice existed in our society. I am a divorced mom with 3 children ages 14,12&5. My divorce never went to court becuase my ex said "you keep the kids since you have taken care of them all along" But once he remarried (5 months after our divorce) all that has changed. I certainly understand and symapthize with your dilemna and hope that the laws of this country will change. It is my hope too that we as the supposed adults can learn from our mistakes so that we can raise healthy well adjusted children who are the future of this country.
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